Saturday, January 30, 2010

Ronald Weinland: Apocalyptic Boredom

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
Ordinations and Baptisms Pt 5 (Summary)
Countdown: 845 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 121
Fulfilled Prophecies: 0
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet Ronald Weinland spoke from Minneapolis, MN this Saturday.

To summarize his blathering: Blah, blah, blah, blah…. (You didin't miss anything.) Weinland’s God given ability to bore shows no sign of weakening.

It won’t be too long before he has to exercise his ability to change timelines again, but remember everything that’s in the book will still happen just later at some unspecified time in the future that is approaching us rapidly. Stay on guard and *fight* for this way of life by sending in your tithes and listening to Ron fumble his way through sermon after sermon.

An interesting article about the false prophet (not Ron in this case).

Cool video of the week.

Tick Tock.
Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed


jack635 said...

Weinland’s God given ability to bore shows no sign of weakening

You got that right! It is almost torture to listen to his babble every Saturday.

Perhaps the detainees in Gitmo should have been forced to listen to Ronald Weinland's sermons. They would have cracked very quickly.

Baywolfe said...

Of all the XCOG groups, Ron's seems to be in contention for the title of loopiest message. The only other competitor seems to be David J. Smith who left back when HWA was still alive and sees "black helicopters" and "The Illuminati" behind every bush.

I know Smith's church looks like it has about 50 people. Does anybody know how many are left in Ron's church?

jack635 said...

I'm guessing less than 300. And that's too many.

I guess the right answer is too many.

Baywolfe said...

Yeah, I agree, too many.

With apoligies to anyone who still has friends or relatives inside; my main concern is the lives of anyone under 18.

I'm sure the group skews old, as a whole, but there has to be a few.

Kirrily XPKG said...

One of the girls who was left in the group is only 21 or 22 :-(