Monday, April 30, 2012

Ronald Weinland: Two Scoops of Crazy

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
God’s Witnesses P2 (Summary)
Countdown: 24 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 4
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0
<= The Beast that won't kill the Witnesses.
False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Cincinnati, OH this Sabbath. He continued his revision of the account of the Two Witnesses. He explained they wouldn’t breathe fire, turn water to blood or physically strike the earth with plagues. *yawn* He did not mention being hated by the whole earth such that everyone gives gifts to each other when they die. His sermons are bad, maybe not that bad and he simply does not have the exposure. But, I’ve given junior his tuna and he promised to stop scratching up my couch. He was winking when he said it. I think he had something in his eye, anyway back to Ron.

He also does not expect the exposure. Wha?!

No appearances on TV, no interviews, no publicity until after Christ' s return. Wait a minute!

The Seventh Thunder would prove to the world that Ron was God's End Time prophet. That's what Ron prophesied. That's what God gave Ron, inspired Ron to write in GFW - 2008. Now, Ron does not believe that?

This was to happen before Christ returned not after! LOL! 


Things are 'happening differently' as in not how Weinland prophesied. This is admission of false prophecy.

I prophecy that things will continue to 'happen differently' - as in not the way Ronald Weinland prophesies.

There will be no nuclear war before May 27th.

Ron has a new post on his blog.  Ron has doubled down on the crazy. God has told Ron nuclear war will happen before May 27th. Ron and Laura will ascend to heaven when Christ returns. Glory. LOL, I just checked the calendar May 26th is a Saturday. Ron will give a sermon just BEFORE Christ returns! Amazing to understand! That ought to be a good one. Ron should be really worked up.
Nap time!
Biker cat


The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...24 days and 4 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.

Dill Weed

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Waiting 98 Years for Jesus to Literally, Physically Kick A**

98 years and counting.



Jehovah's Witnesses - a religon with a track record of failed prophecies. 1914 prominently among them. That was the year, Jehovah's Witnesses (their predecessors) claimed Jesus would Return. Only, he didn't.

What did Jehovah's Witnesses do? They claimed he returned spiritually. He sat on his 'spiritual throne'. He watched World War I, the Great Depression, World War II, the Holocaust, the influenza epidemic, the Korean war, Vietnam war, Iraq I & II and others pass. Still he sits on his throne and Jehovah's Witnesses wait and wait and wait - almost one hundred years now. JW theology is still waiting for the Great Tribulation and *yawn* Armageddon.

JW's have their own 144,000 kings and priests in waiting. The Great tribulation and all that Revelation stuff was to start when they all died. First those of the age of understanding in 1914, then those born in 1914, then those of 'that generation'. As the numbers of the 'partakers'(passover particpants) dwindled excitment built because the Great Trib and Armageddon were getting near! When it didn't happen, it was time for re-defining of the word generation. JW's are waiting for the generation of 1935 to pass on so Jesus can get on with it already. Good luck with that.

JW's are exceeded in failed prophecies by Ellen White - who probably would have lost a hell of a lot of money at the horse track, but fortunately, she was in the God business where failed prophecies can easily be glossed over.

JW's and their governing body - the group of wise heads who set and change JW beliefs are sophisticated and calculating. They are are running up to the hundredth anniversary of Christ's 'sitting on his spiritual throne with his enemies as his foot stool.' After a hundred years of thumb twiddling perhaps he is ready to do something. Eh, we'll see.

But for PKG, the Great Tribulation, Armageddon and all that Revelation stuff will be over May 27th! Must be relief to have all them Thunders, Trumpets and Vials done. And they'll have the Two Witnesses until Christ returns. It will be smooth sailing from then on.

I was wondering, how many meals have PKG members missed during this Great Tribulation? Aside from the three days they fasted. My supermarket has been well stocked and I have five supermarkets to choose from - well six, actually. The Weinlands seem to have been able to catch a meal during their travels, too. But. of course, Satan and his minions have attacked them with traffic jams and with discourteous people who won't move out of their way on sidewalks, not to mention those scoundrels who leave paper towels on restroom floors. Oh, they'll burn!

The surviving PKG members - those who weren't brought up before magistrates and beheaded for their beliefs must be happy. Under a month to go to receive their heavenly reward. Some expect to be ruling from heaven over mankind perhaps with Ron, Laura and their children. Heady days are coming. What rich rewards do God and Christ have in store for Ron and Laura for their faithful service in the face of vicious mocking? Their courage, steadfastness - except for that thing in Toronto, but that's understandable. They've been spiritually dead for the last 3 1/2 years.

Will God and Jesus see fit to leave Ron and Laura on earth for the rest of their natural lives or will they go to heaven? After all, they don't really get killed in the streets of Jerusalem by the Beast power that hasn't risen. Could PKGers be blessed with the opportunity to continue supporting the Weinland's with their 10% tithes?

We can only wait and listen.

Tick Tock

Monday, April 23, 2012

Ronald Weinland: The Bible Means What I Say it Means.

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
God’s Witness (Summary
Countdown: 32 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 4
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Australia this Sabbath.

The Current Truth, Past Truth Game.

The Two Witnesses of Revelation are not going to be killed in the streets of Jerusalem.

Dang! Junior and I had already bought each other gifts and now we’re not going to be able to celebrate with the rest of the world because the bible doesn’t mean what it says. It means what Ronald Weinland says.


Whoa there Junior, you’ll still get that crate of tuna! Stop scratching my leg! You don't want to end up...well.

What else doesn’t the bible mean? Well, hell, just ask Ronald Weinland because God speaks into his mind. Good thing, Ron's brother, Jesus, also a whisperer into Ron's mind, is Returning May 27th after the Great Tribulation, Armageddon and all that other Revelation stuff – like the Seven Vials of God’s anger.
Ron is using old faithful - the reliable explainer for failed prophecy. New light, as Jehovah’s Witnesses put it. Current truth, past truth as Weinland puts it.

It allows you to change what you said the bible meant yesterday and even any prophecies you may have made in God's name to something more convenient today. (Yeah! Or should I say, Yahweh!) After all, where are you going to go for God’s truth? God give His Truth through me. You can only understand it IF God allows you to understand it.

You must rely on me to understand God’s truth. Don’t forget to send in 10% on your income so God will continue to allow you to understand His truth which I will faithfully deliver - like I did 3 ½ years ago when I wrote, under God’s inspiration, GFW – 2008.

I revealed God’s perfect plan. God told me that the Two Witnesses would die in the streets of Jerusalem and everyone would see it on TV. I prophesied that and the Seven Thunders and blah blah blah - like the deaths of my former colleagues - all would happen exactly as revealed to me by God proving I'm His End-Time prophet, Spokeman Witness, blah blah blah.

They haven’t happened yet, but they will. You betcha! Those old codgers can’t live forever.

I’ve been avoiding the non-fulfillment of my (Elohim's) prophecies by talking about the past – you know old boring scriptures that have already been talked to death and find some exciting new meaning in some obscure word no one cares about. Oh, I just get so excited and God does, too! It’s incredible to understand, amazing, dumbfounding. You are blessed to be reliant on me and my silent, but helpful wife for the Truth.

I hope you will forget about all those things the Two Witnesses were supposed to do- eating beans and farting flames -all spiritual anyway. And all that stuff Christ is supposed to do when He returns – spiritual, too. All that Revelation stuff – the destruction, Vials, Bowls and all that jazz – spiritual too. What a relief, eh?

God's not pissed at all. Neither is Jesus. They were just joshing. I bet they even forgot my flight from Toronoto when the bad man blasphemed Jesus. I didn't have my Two Witness powers back then you see so I had to run. It's different now though. I have the power. Don’t forget to write that check! Or God will get angry and I can only hold Him off so long! Hurry!

PS. I am not a false prophet.

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...32 days and 4 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.

Dill Weed

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Ronald Weinland: What More Could You Ask For?

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
Split Sermon Yawner (Summary)
Countdown: 63 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 6
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Australia this Sabbath. He took the afternoon off – except the announcements which weren’t included in the download. Mike recapped them.

I asked myself why would I listen to Ron lackeys who aren’t smart enough to figure out Ron’s a false prophet (or are in on the con) and I found my answer on Mike’s blog. I had to hear what Wayne Matthews said.

He said the simplest explanation for their belief is that God told Ron of His perfect plan. I can just imagine Ron wincing and groaning when he said it. Because Ron knows the truth. He just does not tell it. He is going to have to deny the truth quicker than that other apostle, Peter.

Favorite new cat
Second Trumpet?

Kitty Kat picnic

Tick Tock.

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...63 days and 6 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed

Monday, April 9, 2012

Ronald Weinland: Hiding in the Safety of the Scriptures

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
The Ultimate Jubilee (Summary)
Countdown: 70 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 7
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from New Zealand this Sabbath. He spent most of the boooooring sermon finding new meaning in old scriptures, new word meanings and blah, blah blah. All demonstrating his wisdom and understanding which of course *yawn* God gave him. Boring.

He managed to avoid mention of all that stuff that isn’t happening. Crickets. He really seemed to enjoy and emphasize any chance he had of something ‘happening at the last.’ The sermon was an apocalyptic yawner. Tick Tock.

Too cool for school

Tick Tock.

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...70 days and 7 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Ronald Weinland: I Told You So.

Let’s revisit Ron’s last post and see "where we are in time."

Over three years ago, the process began that is leading this world into a complete global meltdown, ending in a final world war. Where are the combatants? Where is the lead up? There are 7 weeks left.

In this final time, God is allowing mankind to temporarily experience a false sense of hope and belief that he can solve his own problems and that life will once again “get back on track.” I think Ron may soon have a message from God. Jesus will probably deliver it into Ron’s mind letting us know, heck, God’s gonna give us more time after all.

The hype in the stock market and false confidence in the power of the U.S. dollar is the epitome of man’s pride. Weinland continues to spend the soon to be worthless US dollar. The Dow is at 13,000 and Europe is working out its debt problems. “Crisis” is not being thrown around as much by the msm.

Jesus Christ is returning as King of kings on May 27th of this year, it is understood that others fully disbelieve that such is possible in only a short time. *Yawn* We don’t have long to wait do we? Tick Tock.
The false euphoria of choosing to believe that life is improving will only be a temporary experience and will only produce a far greater traumatic crash at the end. Ditto the above.

Such exaggerated wishful thinking will only lead to a more painful reality once a complete global implosion strikes. Aww, go pet a cat and support Mikey’s run for President of the USA. (see comment with cat pic)
The dollar is rapidly going the way of ancient Rome. I bought a cup of coffee for 20 cents today. Spent a quarter and got a nickel back. Take that you worthless dollar. I'm thankful that if you Google Ronald Weinland you get smacked by a truck load of posts from his quite able mockers.

U.S. is about to lose its place as a major player, and Europe, Iran, China, Russia, and Israel will step in as the major players. 7 count’em, 7 weeks left for this *yawn* to happen. But, remember it could all happen in the last 1/2 day.

Europe Is Rising. Really? Where is that 10 nation wonder to behold? The one that will *yawn* conquer the US, UK, Australia, New Zealand and who will *yawn* hear unsettling noises rising out of the East? You know the 200 million man army. Is this being missed on the news?

For over sixty (long) years, God’s Church has been warning the world about this final power that will come upon the world in the form of ten unified nations in Europe. Do tell, Ron. Do tell God’s End Time prophet, Spokesman for The Two Witnesses of Revelation and God’s conduit to all mankind. Do tell.
Their belief is that the destruction of Israel will trigger “the coming” of the last Islamic Messiah. Well they better get crackin’, eh? TIME TO PUT THAT FALAFEL DOWN, put on that turbin AND GET TO WORK.

And he ends with... The signs are everywhere, but few are willing to discern them. Yes indeed, all but COGPKG members see them.

Oh and one other thing. Ron has taken several hours complimenting God's plan. How perfect it is. How intricate, how organized, how specific and accurate in every possible way. Just,... just... well perfect. Kind of like what you'd expect from God.

But wait... Not everything thing is going to "go as expected with the Two Witnesses." Waa???

Has God made a Boo-Boo?
Are The Two Witnesses going to die at The Beast's hands about 7 weeks from now? Won't Jesus be returning May 27th to fulfill, put the final point on God's perfect plan for redemption as described in the bible? As prophecied by God (Himself) through Jesus (Himself, too) through Ronald and Laura Weindland? Waa????
Stay tuned we're about to slip off the deep end.

Tick Tock