Sunday, July 19, 2009

Weinland Prophesies: No Super Bowl in 2012

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
Mercy Pt. 2 (Sermon Summary)
Countdown: 1041 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 149
Fulfilled Prophecies: 0


Join Dill Weed, Jr. in the followers section. For your safety, leave the dry cat food at home! Jr. has a pleasant disposition and is good company as long as there isn’t any dry cat food around. : D

O said, “Dill Weed has a nice friendly site with not as much traffic as here (I do my best to fight congestion.). I will probably check out what he has to say about today’s sermon but if he’s just looking for prophecies to write about there probably won’t be much to say. LOL”
O was right.
I talked with O recently about the lack of prophesy in Ron’s sermons. O pointed out that when giving sermons Ron was acting as a pastor caring for the flock’s needs. O pointed out some scriptures, two lamp stands, two olive trees, etc. Ok, I’ll go with that. Pastoring, as valuable as it may be, does not distinguish the Two Witnesses as the Two Witnesses.
Prophesying, striking the earth with plagues, preventing rain, and angering the world enough so that people give gifts when they die distinguishes the two most powerful prophets ever!
Ron may be waiting on God deliver the power to do those things. I can go along with that, too. But sooner, rather than later Ron’s going to have to deliver or face being exposed as a false prophet.
Ron has tried his hand at prophesying without remarkable results. Anyone wanting to argue the case for Ron’s prophet hood has some sizeable obstacles to overcome. I’m not going to retread them here. I’d rather focus on what’s to come….
Ronald Weinland has prophesied that there will be no Super Bowl in 2012!
Christ is scheduled to return May 2012. His flight is booked. Ron could pay for it with his frequent flier miles.
Before He returns though there will be an enormous gathering of the world’s armies for Armageddon. Before that people will be stung for five months by locust/scorpions and seek a way to die, but be unable to do it (there goes the Super Bowl). Before that there will be a great worldwide earthquake also the earth will have been hit by a giant meteor (there goes the playoffs). Before that America would have been destroyed by the EU led by the Anti-Christ - and we all know their 'football' is really soccer (boring) [there goes the regular season]. Before that everyone will have to have the mark of the beast to buy or sell (even Super Bowl tickets). Before and during all of the above, Ron and Laura will be striking the earth with plagues as often as they wish and stopping rain wherever they choose (there goes the pre-season). During all of the above drinking water will be in short supply, too. There probably won’t be a 2011 football season and it doesn’t look good for pre-season games, either.
If this fails to pan out, could Ron and Laura pull a Jim and Tammy Fay Baker mea culpa and survive?
Or is it too late for Ron to repent?
Tick Tock.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed

2 comments:

todd said...

darn it! and i bet that would have been the year the bengals went all the way!

Dill Weed said...

It'd be the year the Cubs won the World Series, too.


Dill Weed