Saturday, December 24, 2011

Weinland: No Marriage or Dating Until Christ Returns

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
The End Tyranny Pt. 1 (Summary)
Countdown: 163 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 20
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Ron’s Death Toll: 0


False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Richmond, VA this Sabbath. There will be no more counseling for married members because *yawn* The End is so near. Blah, blah, blah, blah….

Ron is still convinced he God’s End Time profit. "There is open vocalization about WW III." Why not just say people are talking about WW III? Ron believes WWW III is imminent. 10 European nations are going to *yawn* unite. The Germans don’t understand that they are really the Assyrians even though they have a museum about the Assyrians. Blah, blah, blah, blah….

Weinland et al is preparing for The End. Incredible opportunities wait for the members God has drawn into PKG. (Like explaining to their friends and relatives why Jesus didn’t return May 27, 2012.) Blah, blah, blah, blah….

Ron’s really talking up their opportunities – the places God has *yawn* prepared for them. (Eyeroll) They need to prepare for baptizing people all over the world and for positions in God’s government. (LOL) There will be no more marriage counseling for PKGers. They must decide between unbelieving mates or PKG. There can be no marriage, remarriage or dating until Christ returns.

Sunday mornings

This guy can herd cats.


Tick Tock.

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...173 days and 26 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed

10 comments:

jack635 said...

Like explaining to their friends and relatives why Jesus didn’t return May 27, 2012.

I had a thought whilst reading that. How many PKG members will be performing dramatic acts in front of their friends and family around the middle of may? Begging on their knees, tears streaming down their cheeks "please you have to repent and turn to Jesus, He's coming in a few days. Please. Please"

They are going to be so embarrassed and ashamed of their behaviour. Unemployed, depressed, financially broken, and maybe even homeless. May 27th is going to be a big day.

Merry Christmas DW. You should buy junior something he can sleep on. Actually never mind. There will be lots of cardboard boxes around.

Douglas Becker said...

Mikey is smarter than I am, but he is slowing down.

For example, it now takes him 75 seconds to solve a Rubic's Cube in that configuration. He used to be able to do it in much less.

Me? Two weeks and I still don't have it. I don't try any more. I just give it to Mikey.

Richard said...

He probably said "vocalization" to continue the great tradition of COG Spokesman Clubs - learning and using new words, to be a more effective speaker.

C'mon now - how many of us even heard the word "inculcate" before becoming part of a COG?

Dill Weed said...

You can't inculcate vocalization.


Dill Weed

Eric said...

How telling.....

"if someone had told us, any of us, what we would be doing today, 5 years ago, let alone 10 years ago, or back in 1994 when some of these things began, I would have thought that's the most insane thing you could ever come up with, you could ever conceive of in you mind, that we would have what we have today."

Actually he was, as a prophet supposed to know what was going to happen. I am aware that sometimes in the old and new testament that prophets are some times shown the outcome but not the details of how its going to come about but Ronald Weinland is a very details type "prophet" He has written about what he considers the exact events that will occur before the second coming of Christ. He has spoken about the deluge of converts that will join before this second coming - how were they supposed to be been baptized then except by a large of body of elders. In fact the number he has is much too small to achieve what he has prophesied.

He scores an own goal and defines himself as insane (again).

He can only last till March 8th and then he will be looking for a way out. The feast of Purim will give him one. That's my own non prophetic guess.

Anonymous said...

Once again you are not telling the full truth. What Ron said about dating and marriage was only directed at those who divorce

DennisCDiehl said...

Ron will learn to quote Yogi Bera

"I have a hard time making predictions. Especially about the future."

maryland dating said...

When she talks about clothes and makeup, be reasonably interested.
Give chocolate even if she passes it straight to her younger brother because chocolate are fattening.Surprise her with frequent, but not necessary expensive gifts.

Douglas Becker said...

When she talks about clothes and makeup, be reasonably interested.

Well, now, see, I'm not much interested in Laura Weinland.

I figure she has enough from her husband conning the members of his congregation in one complete PKG of insanity.

Moving On said...

Did he really say choose between PKG and your unconverted spouse? IF so, I guess that explains some things around our house... I hope someday Ron and my husband feel the pain they are causing.