Wednesday, June 17, 2009

A Guest Post From Ronald Weinland

It has come to my attention that some of you are taking more than one personalized prophecy from Dill Weed's blog.

Through an exclusive arrangement between Dill Weed and The Two Witnesses of Revelation, my wife and I, as part of our Two Witness and End Time Ministry, have agreed to air personalized prophecies to assorted non-believers and backslidden, non-tithers.

God has granted His Witnesses Control of the Wind, but it comes at a price. Taking more than one prophecy places a great deal of strain on us. Prophecying is not easy. It requires strenous effort to push through weighty spiritual matters, sometimes prophecies slip out easily, but most often not. Most don't come easy. They can be hard to catch, but once we get a whiff of one, Laura and I can make sense of it.

God gives, but we deliver.

We are very busy and can't spend all our time prophecying. Laura keeps the books, buys airline tickets and makes the best hotel accomodations. She also tracks down non-tithers and helps the brethren realize the importance of not skimping on their spiritual responsibilities. I have to prepare my sermons and take care of spiritual matters, too.

God is no respector of an 8 hour work day. He is constantly speaking into my mind about the time we are in and I look forward to telling you more of what He tells me. So, Hebrews and Shebrews, please take only one personalized prophecy per visit to Dill Weed's blog. He is keeping track.

Thank you.

Oh, and Dill Weed asked me to invite you to become a follower of his blog (on the side there). It doesn't cost anything so it won't interfere with your tithe. I recommend it, too. (I'm sure Laura would, also.) Becoming a follower of Dill Weed's blog is recommended by two witnesses out of The Two Witnesses of Revelation. That's 100% if you're keeping track. ; - )

God's Prophet and the 1st Witness of Revelation,

Ronald Weinland

3 comments:

Dill Weed said...

You've really done it this time, Dill Weed!

I only take one personalized prophecy per visit!


Dill Weed

jack635 said...

Dear Mr Weinland,
I am surprised to see you commenting on a site other than your own. I would like to point out that your date of May 2012 has no merit in fact or fiction.
Since Jesus was resurrected in A.D. 30, wouldn't it make sense to conclude he may in fact come back in 2030 A.D.?
Or how about the Hebrew calendar which comes up to the 7000 year mark in 2231 A.D.?

I would like to know by which method of socerey you conjured up the date of May 2012.

Sincerely,
your friend, Jack

Dill Weed said...

Jack,

As they say in Canada, "Meh." I think that roughly translates to a shoudler shrug.

As to the sorcery, why Two Witness sorcery, of course!

Don't miss any of my sermons as there are changes a coming. Dill Weed's assured me he'll keep summarizing them. God's been speaking into my mind again. I just wish he come on with those Powerball numbers. (Big money! Big money! No whammy!)

Oh, Dill Weed's cat avatar is getting lonely in the follwers section. He said you didn't have a followers section on your blog, too.

Ron