Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Waiting 98 Years for Jesus to Literally, Physically Kick A**

98 years and counting.

COG?

Nah.

Jehovah's Witnesses - a religon with a track record of failed prophecies. 1914 prominently among them. That was the year, Jehovah's Witnesses (their predecessors) claimed Jesus would Return. Only, he didn't.

What did Jehovah's Witnesses do? They claimed he returned spiritually. He sat on his 'spiritual throne'. He watched World War I, the Great Depression, World War II, the Holocaust, the influenza epidemic, the Korean war, Vietnam war, Iraq I & II and others pass. Still he sits on his throne and Jehovah's Witnesses wait and wait and wait - almost one hundred years now. JW theology is still waiting for the Great Tribulation and *yawn* Armageddon.

JW's have their own 144,000 kings and priests in waiting. The Great tribulation and all that Revelation stuff was to start when they all died. First those of the age of understanding in 1914, then those born in 1914, then those of 'that generation'. As the numbers of the 'partakers'(passover particpants) dwindled excitment built because the Great Trib and Armageddon were getting near! When it didn't happen, it was time for re-defining of the word generation. JW's are waiting for the generation of 1935 to pass on so Jesus can get on with it already. Good luck with that.

JW's are exceeded in failed prophecies by Ellen White - who probably would have lost a hell of a lot of money at the horse track, but fortunately, she was in the God business where failed prophecies can easily be glossed over.

JW's and their governing body - the group of wise heads who set and change JW beliefs are sophisticated and calculating. They are are running up to the hundredth anniversary of Christ's 'sitting on his spiritual throne with his enemies as his foot stool.' After a hundred years of thumb twiddling perhaps he is ready to do something. Eh, we'll see.

But for PKG, the Great Tribulation, Armageddon and all that Revelation stuff will be over May 27th! Must be relief to have all them Thunders, Trumpets and Vials done. And they'll have the Two Witnesses until Christ returns. It will be smooth sailing from then on.

I was wondering, how many meals have PKG members missed during this Great Tribulation? Aside from the three days they fasted. My supermarket has been well stocked and I have five supermarkets to choose from - well six, actually. The Weinlands seem to have been able to catch a meal during their travels, too. But. of course, Satan and his minions have attacked them with traffic jams and with discourteous people who won't move out of their way on sidewalks, not to mention those scoundrels who leave paper towels on restroom floors. Oh, they'll burn!

The surviving PKG members - those who weren't brought up before magistrates and beheaded for their beliefs must be happy. Under a month to go to receive their heavenly reward. Some expect to be ruling from heaven over mankind perhaps with Ron, Laura and their children. Heady days are coming. What rich rewards do God and Christ have in store for Ron and Laura for their faithful service in the face of vicious mocking? Their courage, steadfastness - except for that thing in Toronto, but that's understandable. They've been spiritually dead for the last 3 1/2 years.

Will God and Jesus see fit to leave Ron and Laura on earth for the rest of their natural lives or will they go to heaven? After all, they don't really get killed in the streets of Jerusalem by the Beast power that hasn't risen. Could PKGers be blessed with the opportunity to continue supporting the Weinland's with their 10% tithes?

We can only wait and listen.

Tick Tock





4 comments:

Douglas Becker said...

The good thing is, that when Ronald Weinland fails one more time on May 27th, all of the Armstrongist Churches of God are put at risk.

Why?

Because they are all cut from the same cloth and use the same methods -- which have been failing.

Make no mistake.

People in the other Armstrongist churches will start asking themselves questions.

And this time, it won't be so easy to hide from them.

Major, major fail.

Brother Rolf said...

He will say He didn't know his disciples were going to fast. So God put off the second coming until he consults with Ron.

eric said...

"Yes, the final prophesied collapse is at the door. At one time it was years away, then months, and now only weeks away."

11 weeks now PKGers. Another non event predicted by Ron that hasn't been fulfilled and on May 27th will be explained away or forgotten by bringing up some new stuff..........

Douglas Becker said...

Ronald Weinland seems to have God's day planner.

He could rip out a few pages and we'd never know.