Sunday, April 15, 2012

Ronald Weinland: What More Could You Ask For?

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
Split Sermon Yawner (Summary)
Countdown: 63 Days
Remaining Sabbaths: 6
Fulfilled Prophecies: 1
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Australia this Sabbath. He took the afternoon off – except the announcements which weren’t included in the download. Mike recapped them.

I asked myself why would I listen to Ron lackeys who aren’t smart enough to figure out Ron’s a false prophet (or are in on the con) and I found my answer on Mike’s blog. I had to hear what Wayne Matthews said.

He said the simplest explanation for their belief is that God told Ron of His perfect plan. I can just imagine Ron wincing and groaning when he said it. Because Ron knows the truth. He just does not tell it. He is going to have to deny the truth quicker than that other apostle, Peter.

TICK TOCK
Favorite new cat
Second Trumpet?

Kitty Kat picnic

Tick Tock.

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...63 days and 6 Sabbaths remain.

Your time runs short, Ron Weinland. Judgment day is coming.
Dill Weed

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

What More Could You Ask For?

A guilty verdict.

Andrew Guenthner said...

I would imagine Ron's underlings feel more pressure not to go overtime, so, although the sermon might have been more boring (is that possible?), hopefully it wasn't as long as normal.

That expectation that maybe it would be over sooner, that was the little straw of hope I used to grasp during WCG sermons when it was the ministerial trainee's turn to speak.

Ron Weinland said...

I'm starting a new religion in June. Anyone wantign to join me?

Anonymous said...

Are you falling apart?

I think I have some old superglue.

Ron Weinland said...

Seriously. Any takers? My old people are leaving so I need some new ones. Instead of face to face sermons we'll do it all by internet from my place in the Seychelles. Usual tithe plus $20,000 for listing in the Elite Club of Warriors (limit 500). ECW members will be able to charge $10,000 to up to 1000 others in the 'Club of Warriors' and keep half. They in turn can recruit up to 1000 people as 'Warriors' at $5000 and keep half.
We cabn terandform the world peple (and keep me in style in the Seychelles...) Oh God did I just say that out loud?

Anonymous said...

Weinland,

You can preach to the souls in prison during the Great Flood about your fate.

Whineland said...

If you think I'm really Weinland that's how I got my followers in the first place Douglas.

Anonymous said...

I really do know better.

Whineland.

Really funny!