Thursday, May 24, 2012

Ronald Weinland: I Believe I’ll Be in Jerusalem Tomorrow

A Prophet’s Log (Flush)
The New World (Summary)
Countdown: 48 hours
Remaining Sabbaths: 0
Fulfilled Prophecies: 0*
Failed Prophecies: Priceless
Ron’s Death Toll: 0

False prophet and Spokesman Witness Ronald Weinland spoke from Cincinnati, OH - just hours before an impending nuclear war and Christ’s Return. He is giving the last sermon of this 'age'. The millennium will be ushered in, in just hours!

Ron and Laura are the only ones who are for certain to become part of Elohim because it is written. The rest of you will just have to wait and see. Are you ready? Do you doubt?

Ronald and Laura Weinland’s walk of faith ends in hours!

What if it doesn’t happen? God is just. Whatever happens has a purpose.

Ron said, “If time were to go on. That we have, that I have, that we all have things to address. That if we yield ourselves to the process... something greater will be made within us. Something more will be given to us because we follow God… For my life, I know it would be a royal nightmare. But, I don’t believe those things. I believe I’ll be in Jerusalem tomorrow.”

Tomorrow, Weinland believes he will be in Jerusalem… wait for it…. without getting on a plane. (He’ll be able to skip his court date.) Laura will be there, too, along with other COG-PKGers who are miraculously transformed into *yawn* Elohim.

Welcome, Ronald Weinland to your Royal Nightmare.


Your time has run out, Ron Weinland.

Judgment day is here. 

The Andrew G. slide rule correction for cats who can't subtract very well...48 hours remain.

Dill Weed


jack635 said...

Ha Ha. Your last sentence made me think of Alice Cooper. Welcome To My Nightmare.

Kirrily said...

Thanks for your dedication all these years Dill, I've so appreciated your blog.

Well, going to be very interesting to see what Rotten Ronnie does when Jesus doesn't return!

Douglas Becker said...

Get ready folks!

Nothing is about to happen!

Mark said...

Why, exactly, did he even post a "last sermon?"
Some of his neighbors need to check up on them this weekend. Who knows what can happen if he is that desperate.
I wonder what in the world he and his wife are doing at this very moment? I mean, his work is completed!

Dill Weed said...

Thanks for your readership, for your insight and for sharing your story. : D

I've been looking forward to this. It is time to leave a record so condeming that no one listens to this con man again. He will never live this down, ever.

Dill and Junior

Painful Truth said...

Weinland is one sorry sack of shit! Really, he is.

We'll see how Monday goes for Lucifer's son and his lovely bride.